Something that’s been bugging me recently. I think a lot of people commonly cover up or ignore parts of their life that they’re not happy with. I think people actively lie to themselves about things. I think people often know one thing, but do another.
I saw a program on television recently about some explorer bloke who managed to get initiated into a remote forest tribe in the West-African country of Gabon. It involved taking some weirdass mind altering drug (read: tree roots) over a few days which made him violently ill and have some horrific hallucinations. He said a consequence of this experience was that he was made to actively confront parts of his life that he’d locked away in the deepest recesses of his mind. By bringing things to a head like this, he was able to realise what he’d done earlier in life. And he concluded he was a better person because he could finally put it behind him.
I think people do this sort of thing all the time. They lie to themselves. They’re unfaithful to themselves. They refuse to accept or admit something about themselves.
My biggest “personality pet peeve” is simple: people who are fake. I think I’m a pretty good judge of character, and I can see through people very easily. As far as possible, I try to keep my judgements of people limited. For example, I won’t judge people on the job they do. Or where they come from or where they live. I don’t care if you’re the Prince of Wales, or the bloke who empties my bins (excuse the stereotype), if you’re a good person, then I don’t have a problem with you. Defining a ‘good person’ is of course a tricky concept, and subjectivity begins to creep in. A good person to me, might be a total chopper to you. And vice versa.
The point being is I will judge you as being a chopper if I can see through you. If you’re trying to be someone you’re not, I’ll probably see it. I might not say anything about it, but I’ll probably see it. People are who they are. People can be who they want to be. But people aren’t who they want to be. And there’s the distinction. If you’re not who you want to be and equally you are who you don’t want to be, then it’s up to you to become the person you ought to be. Don’t pretend to be someone else and don’t ignore what you don’t want to be.
Make the difference. Stop lying to yourself. BE who you want to be.
Easy.