What a load of cock

I don’t tend to get involved in political commentary, I’m much too apathetic to get worked up over all that business. But this one got me going.

A swingeing increase in tax on alcopops and other alcoholic drinks favoured by teenagers is being demanded by the health secretary, Patricia Hewitt, in an attempt to stop young people damaging their health by binge drinking.

She has written to the chancellor asking him to ratchet up the cost of alcohol in his next budget, to price it beyond the reach of youngsters’ earnings or pocket money.

It’s an interesting theory. There are young people drinking a lot. Therefore if we put the price up, then they can’t afford it. Huzzah! Of course, an unfortunate side-effect would be that it’s a blanket tax, and everyone would be affected, and so, unfortunately, the Government would raise a few extra squillion quid in the extra money. That’d be a shame wouldn’t it.

The most idiotic thing about this proposal is that it’s in part aimed at underage drinkers, or at least that’s the implication by saying that young people’s pocket money shouldn’t be able to afford booze. Now, I might be wrong, but I seem to remember there already being certain safeguards in place for this sort of thing. Something about an age limit for drinking? If kids are getting their hands on booze and drinking themselves silly (and we’ve all been there, I’ve certainly got the scars to show for it) then your average Joe Drinker shouldn’t be punished for it by paying extra taxes, the irresponsible shopkeepers hellbent on profit and the irresponsible parents who don’t do a proper job of supervising their kids should. I don’t know – lock them up, or fine them a million pounds. Make the punishments severe and you might see a reaction.

Of course, all this is entirely confusing and hipocritical. Last year they were worried about binge drinking, and then agreed to the principle of 24 hour drinking licenses. Now they’re telling us what we can or can’t do? If I want to go out and drink 18 pints of Wife Beater and get shitfaced, why shouldn’t I? If I end up getting run over or starting a fight, then I have to live with the consequences. If I die of an “alcoholic liver” then that’s my fault.

I’m getting increasingly bored with the Nanny State in which we’re living. Can’t do this, can do that, going to tax you for that. It’s such a load of bollocks. It’s so two-faced. It’s no wonder so many people are turning to drink.