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You're reading a really old version of matt-thornton's website. For example, if you're looking at the movie reviews... you'll notice that none of them are of recent films. Indeed, I leave them here for posterity's sake, but I doubt very much that they'll get updated anytime soon. So have a giggle.
You might, if you're lucky, find something recent from Matt at his blog matt's debates. Kernow bys vyken.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
the one line review:
brains, anyone?
the overview
This is the 2003, remake, and not the 1974 original. Certain things were changed but the premise is the same. It's frankly quite sick, but not all that scary.
the plot:
5 teens are driving back from a holiday in Mexico when they pick up a girl who happens to be just a bit mental. Clearly traumatised, she proceeds to blow her brains out (literally) in the back of their van. They try and find the local Sheriff to sort things out, who happens to be nuttier than a squirrel's bumbag.
After enticing a couple of them up to a big ol' house on a hill, they eventually encounter "Leatherface", a facially deformed bloke, who happens to wear people's skin in place of his own. And hunt people down with, as the title suggests, a chainsaw (amongst other things). He has a penchant for hanging people up on bigass hooks, while they're still alive, and making furniture out of their bones. Nice.
Anyway. What ensues is a series of fairly gruesome deaths, peril induced runaway scenes, and plenty of gore, blood and guts.
the verdict:
I can't compare it to the first, because I haven't yet seen it. By all accounts though, it's nowhere near as controversial as the first one, which was banned from the UK for 25 years after its release (in an The Exorcist stylee). People say it's based on a true story, and even though the sicko that Leatherface is based on actually exists (Ed Gein) those in the know will tell you that the films are pure fiction, simply borrowing a couple of ideas from the madman.
This version is not all that scary. It has a couple of sick moments (I'm not a big fan of finger nails being ripped out of fingers) and your typical "I'll be right back"/"I heard a noise I'll just go see what it was"/"He's behind you" horror flick sorta stuff. Additionally, Jessica Biel (below) has a very bouncy set of boobies, which wobble about in a tight white top for most of the film.
It's more of a weird film than a genuine horror film. There aren't any particularly tense or jumpy momments, and nothing truly shocking, it's more about exploring the derangement of the characters.
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